The seasons die out one after another

The war is almost over

If you ask

No, I don’t regret it all

Because you’ve been my inspiration

Well it’s not totally over
For everything is a process and not a smooth, linear one
Some scars you made are ugly yet theb reminder of your presence

You cut off the connection with me like I’m the evil villain
Left me wondering along my healing journey
Am I really bad to you?
Am I the bad guy?
Or is it me in your version of story?

Whatever it is, whatever you consider to do
Whenever I think of you,
I always want to remember your kindness
So I can keep my mind in peace

“I address a nostalgic poem, reflecting upon my expired past;
When I realize those terrible days- those horrid dreams…were really the beginning, they seem so far away
Our flowers will surely wilt one day, returning to the circle of life —
Filled with suffering — grieving and moaning, but never dying out…even when starved of sunlight

The seasons revive, one after another.”

Note:

The title is the translation from a song “Kisetsu wa Tsugitsugi Shindeiku” by Amazarashi, and the last paragraph was translation of a part of the song too

Dear Lucio,

I want to listen to all your stories, with your true emotions. Curse all the way you want when you’re mad, cry all your tears when you’re sad, then we can laugh about it together. Your life is a real treasure, and I wish we can go continuing the adventures together.

With love,

Alice

My dearest Lucio

Lucio,
Oh my Lucio,
Every first light of the day, I always wonder if I would meet you today

You’re always gorgeous
Despite those sleepy red eyes
Can’t take my eyes off you
Although yours are on someone else

Ah, my Lucio,
This distance doesn’t matter in my heart
Your statue still stands high

The moment I see you,
Makes my world shine brighter

You’re my reason to live day by day
You’re my inspiration, and my muse
You’re the source of my happiness

Those words you once said,
That might not mean anything to you,
Are the anchor I cling to everyday

Oh, my Lucio,
I might be in love with the idea of you
Who cares, if that makes me this happy

You might treat me this way,
I have never been this free to sway and paint us

I might sometimes lose myself,
Those chances might not come twice

Dear my Lucio,
I have peace with my heart
And happiness with you
Cause you are the light of my life

Regardless of anything

Regardless of the pain,
The first kiss you gave me still is one of the best memories I’ve ever had
Truly tasted like whisky, like those romance songs talked about
Maybe I’ll drink some, to reminisce about us

Regardless of the void,
You still fill half of my brain
I haven’t figured how to get you out
You’re still great in my mind

Regardless of the hopeless,
You’re still my light, of lighter or candle
I already know our future of nothing
Yet I really enjoy drowning in your solace

Regardless of the secrets,
I still crave your touch, your soft, warm skin
That made me figure out the meaning of being content
Ah, how I miss those warmth

Regardless of anything,
I love you
My intriguing hero

Fallen petals

Once
I peeled out my petals to that special someone
That had stolen my heart
I reached out my wires to connect deeper
For they made me so happy

Yet
They cut up the strings and walked away
Said nothing, disappeared
I was left wondering, while I knew the truth
Yes, I knew the painful truth

Still
The wound hurt, so bad
The bleeding wouldn’t stop, for a while
I wept alone for the void I couldn’t replace

I knew the truth
Yet wasn’t able enough to accept that
I trusted in their kindness
But it had its limit

Fallen petals were destined to rot
To nourish new ones
That are growing slowly
But surely

All the sweet things and nice talks
I never lied to you
I wanted to understand you
I hoped for your happiness

I love you,
my complicated hero

Closed door

Blue sky is not always clear
Sometimes the clouds paint it
That will boost the beauty
Look, it’s a sky that you like

My soul is not clean
Yet slowly, the peace is regained
You who I desire
Will always be in my mind

You who is kind to me
And you whom I opened my layers to
Now lives in my heart

You who is in front of my eyes
Gradually, I don’t recognize anymore
Leaving me wondering with the old you
What happened to him?

I want to embrace the change
I want to accept your true self
Alas, you don’t let me in
You closed your door

If I stay, will you open your door to me?
If I leave, will I see you again?

You went to the place I couldn’t reach
And you wouldn’t look at me
I guess it’s my turn to leave

But if I may say,
Let me thank you
For the blooming spring you gave me
And the comforting heat of your sun

I love you, still love you
If we ever meet again, in another life
I hope that we’re together for eternity
And we’ll never let each other go

Once upon a life

Once upon a life,
Sun rises with you by my side,
Every morning
And we’ll have morning kisses

Once upon a life,
I’m expert in ironing your regalia
That you wear with so much pride
And we’ll kiss again in the doorway

Once upon a noon,
When I know you’ll be sleepy
Because of nice weather
And I’ll send you that captured clear blue sky

Once upon an evening,
When you work so gallantly
That I have to wait until unknown
Then I’ll make sure you’re stuffed

Once upon a night
Sometimes full of passion,
Sometimes cuddles, comforting hugs
We’ll enjoy each other’s heat

We’ll have a nice life
Sometimes adventurous
We’ll serve each other
I want to be by your side

No less love was given
For we’ll make that every day
Whether it’s you or me leading
I’ll make sure you get the pleasure

You’ll be my sun
The center of my world

You’ll be my world
Where I could enjoy life

You’ll be my home
A place where my heart is

Once upon a life,
We’ll be great and tired together
The night cuddles that we seek every day
Will be the moments that we share stories

Once upon a dream,
There lives our perfect life

Right happiness in the wrong time

It’s a year to grow this love
So, another year to wither
Despite its beauty and solace
This heart couldn’t hold onto its thorns

The passion burns brightly
Leaving massive burn wounds
I let you lit up the lighter
While I’m soaked with gasoline

Memories are the only ones you left me
Past ones should be lessons, they said
I never take one
When I’m drunk with this happiness

It’s never fake
Just, the right one happened in the wrong time
Always the wrong time
Always late

Every moments have their right times
I guess not for mine

People come and leave
Some left while the feeling is growing
No one to nurture it except myself
I can’t expect them to come back

Now I’m playing a game of pretend
Me and my mind
Pretending that we’re meant to be together
Pretending that you’re my first view every morning

Sometimes the question marks appear
Makes me wonder to this life
No, the swayed grass won’t answer
Nor the wind that dances with the grass

I meant to soothe my heart
While keeping your happy life
Smiles from afar might not be enough
Because this imaginary scenario keeps playing in my mind

An ordinary life with you

I dream a life with you
Sun’s up and you’re my first nice view
Our life would be amazing
We’ll compete to serve each other

Our life would be ordinary
We take care of our home
We fightin the world
Then we cuddle through the night

There will be no secrets
Only love and trust between us
Sometimes bed sheet
But we never let each other’s hands go

I’ll own your smile and laughters
I’ll gave my chest for your tears
I’ll serve you with body and mind, and heart
Because you’re my dearest

Reality is cruel
No, the expectation is
Love is hopeful, and a trap full of hope
Learned my lesson not to raise my voice

You once said, that I should find my own happiness
Well now I have
But it’s not of this life
Hopefully, another one

A pleasant, ordinary life with you
I might could have
Is playing in my head
Doesn’t a true happiness lie inside the mind?

A lingering pain for a little happiness

I know that this will bound to happen
I know the pain awaiting at the end
But still I chose to take the leap
For a glimpse of happiness

That new piece of pleasure
What a treasure
With thorns at the bottom
Makes my heart bleeds

Ah poor me and my choices
I chose to grab a rose full of thorns
and enjoy its addictive color
And cried when my hand hurt

Another day another happiness
Another day another sorrow
A pleasant, ordinary life drama was playing in my head
Where he’s my home and I am his

Maybe, in another life

It doesn’t matter when it matters
Somehow, true happiness lies inside the head
So I choose to feel happy like feeling high
Is this called flying without wings?

Drowning in sorrow
Nothing could do
The heart would fix itself
Or bleeding to death

I’m doomed
And I’m so dumb

If this lingering pain is the price
For a little piece of happiness
I’m willing to pay
Any tears will dry itself